Not-So-Normal Mom

I decided to post a list that I did on Facebook...It covers some stuff...;-)

Twenty-five Random Things

Rules: Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you.


1. I work really hard.

2. I don't make a lot of money for working really hard.

3. My kids and my husband make working this hard so freaking worth it.

4. The reason why I dress up and never wear sweats or comfy clothing is because I think I'm ugly. The paint and the polish is all to make me feel a little better about myself and hide the ugly a bit when I leave the house.

5. I have a ridiculous addiction to coffee.

6. Sometimes at the college, I feel really stupid, especially when I'm surrounded by these fantastically educated individuals.

7. I don't like when a certain someone at the college refers to my knowledge as "tribal knowledge," implying that I'm not educated.

8. I don't have any patience for stupidity.

9. My most heartfelt wish is that my mortgage would magically be paid off and I could spend more time with my family...and my husband could spend more time with us, too.

10. I wish that we had more money and more space so that I could have another baby...just one more, I swear!

11. I am secretly afraid that I will never finish my education and that I'll never be the teacher that is inside me, yearning to get out.

12. I'm not really afraid of anything conventional...spiders, heights, small spaces, etc... I'm afraid of failure.

13. I'm hoping that I can find the energy to get off of my ass and onto the treadmill or outside for a walk.

14. When I was younger, I wanted to have 12 kids and drive around in a school bus with all of them in the back.

15. In kindergarten, I pulled my parents over on "Back to School Night" to pat the afro'd head of a little black boy in my class. I told them "touch his hair, he doesn't mind." And my parents looked up into the face of his father-a 7-foot tall unhappy black man. Does that explain anything???

16. I used to be a weak girl. I wept over any little thing. Then, my spirit was broken by a mean man and it resulted in me having a hard shell. I'm okay with it because I do allow people in...and when you're in, it's all good...;-)

17. I'll never regret my first marriage. I have two awesome boys as a result of that relationship. I got the best pieces of him.

18. We are going before the judge next month so the boys will oficially be my hubby's sons. It seems like they've always been his sons, but having the name attached will be like icing.;-)

19. If I want something, I let people know. I also will go out and get it. I'm pretty determined and a bit competitive.

20. In another life, I would like to be a painter/sculptor, a cake artist, a pianist, an interior designer, an anthropologist, an architect, a lawyer, and/or a farmer.

21. I worry. I worry so much that I drink Pepto Bismol to calm my stomach. I get myself so worked up that I want to throw up and/or cry.

22. I want to write a book. I always come up with ideas, but I lack creativity and sustainability.

23. I love camping.

24. If I could be any movie character, I would be either Baby from Dirty Dancing or Jean Grey from X-Men.

25. I love my family and my friends. I wish that I had more time to spend loving them.


Consider yourself tagged!!!!!!!!!!!

Peace Out,
Mom

Working this many jobs can be tiring. It's not so much exhausting on my body...but my mind is sooo tired! ;-)

The first couple of weeks of school always takes some getting used to. I have to figure out when and where I'm supposed to be. It changes hour-by-hour, so my little day planner is really getting a workout.

I think I already need a vacation.

Peace Out,
Mom

My little man is in Kindergarten. He didn't go to an academic preschool; instead, he basically went to a childcare center on the college campus where I work. He only attended four half-days a week. This means that he was there from about 9am until 2pm. Our intention to have him enrolled at the center was socialization, and I needed to work mornings.

Neither of my older boys attended any preschool before kinder, and both were okay. Of course, they did attend kinder pre-"No-Child-Left-Behind" when school was different.

When I was in elementary school (many moons ago) I loved to go. I wanted to go and discover new things. I wanted to interact, learn, feel, touch, and grow...all for the sake of learning. I credit my love of learning to the education I received in elementary school. I was taught that the world is full of discoveries to be made and interesting treasures to be uncovered.

Now, all I hear about kinder is "Drill, Drill, Drill." "Test, Test, Test!" Little man can identify words. He has amazing memorization skills. When he is given new words, he learns them quickly and can identify them and spell them almost immediately. The problem-He can't identify the sounds that letters make. He is having some serious issues with phonetics. The teacher basically told me that he has to learn this before she'll pass him on to 1st grade.

I get it...he needs to learn this skill. If you could see how well he reads words that he has learned, you would understand my frustration. It really is quite impressive. I just wish that he could identify the sounds that the letters make. Now, we're drilling with flashcards. It just isn't so fun for him.

I don't want the boys to hate school. I want it to be fun. I want them to grow up being fascinated with how things work. I hope I'm not doing more harm than good.

Peace Out,
Mom

This pic is of by best friend and I at the Bridal Bazaar. This is the cool thing that she's going to do at her wedding in July. There will be a photo booth, and people will get in there and take fun pics. It comes out in doubles and one set goes into a scrap book that the guests sign next to their pic for the newly married couple. I think that is such a fun idea!

This will be my first time as the Matron of Honor. It should be a blast!

Peace Out,
Mom

We finally got the report back from the social worker. She gave her thumbs-up for the adoption to go through, so now we need to call the juvenile court in ten days. For step-parent adoptions, it's pretty straight-forward, and it should go very quickly. All we need to do is go before the judge and sign the papers together. Then, we have a big party! I'm so happy! ;-)

Peace Out,
Mom

My husband and his cousins had a falling out. I don't really know what happened, but I think it had something to do with us buying our house. Let me esplain...

My hubby and his cousins were very close. They moved out here to SD together in the 80's. They lived together, helped each other out, and eventually, they watched each other get married and start families. I was in one of the cousin's weddings, and he was in ours. They were close.

Well, a few years before we were ready to buy a place, one of the cousins studied to become a real estate agent. It was a great time to get in, as the market was shooting through the roof. He did it for a few years, and then moved on to his next business venture. He does this often. He's now a truck driver, and in the past, he operated two car garages. Anyway, it is about that time that we were ready to look for a place. Cousin was very involved in the new business, although he was still licensed to act as our real estate agent. However, my son's teacher was a real estate agent and she was VERY helpful. She hooked us up with some funding, and she drove us around on the weekends to all the places in our price range.

Now, cousin knew that we were looking at places, but he just didn't have the time to help us look. So his solution was this: He wanted us to find the place with our friend, and then when we decided on a place, let him make the offer so that he would get the commission on the place, this leaving my friend high and dry. Wait...What???

Yeah, he wanted her to do all of the work and he wanted to get paid for it. My answer: Hell to the No! That would be taking credit for all of someone else's hard work. This deal would make the real estate agent at least 5 percent. We bought our house for about 400k. Do the math-that's a freakin' lot of money!!!

So, after that, we lost touch. We would call, they wouldn't answer. They stopped calling us and we didn't see them for quite some time. Then, my hubby's dad died and we saw them at the funeral. It was bittersweet. I was so happy to see them, especially their girls, but I was a little annoyed that all of that time had passed without getting all of those hard feelings out. I thought the death would bring them close again. It didn't.

Then two weeks ago, the cousins' mom died. My hubby went back for the funeral and they talked again.

Now, I am getting ready to go over to see them all for the Chargers game today. They have never discussed why they don't talk. They are trying to move on by pretending that it didn't happen. I think that's bullshit. I'm a firm believer in talking it all out and fixing it-not covering over it and pretending its not a mess.

So I get to try to make nice with the wives and commence the small talk, all while wondering whether I'm going to say something that might trigger the fight again...I just don't know what that might be.

Peace Out,
Mom

I was watching the movie Marley and Me today with my mom and I was marveling at how well Jen Aniston plays the "mommy" role. She was a natural. She was very maternal and frustrated and loving, all rolled into one (when warranted and at different times, of course). Then, it got me thinking about Steve Martin. He has played a father in some of my favorite movies-Parenthood, for example. And similar to Jen Aniston, he doesn't have children of his own. However, he plays a great dad.

So why did I start thinking about all of these actors who play parents, without kids of their own? Well, I was wondering just how much of our parenting is an act. Are we mirroring our behaviors on what we think is right because that's what we see other parents doing? How much of our parenting is learned from other's behaviors? Please, don't get me wrong, I'm not challenging anyone's genuine love of the kids, but are there times when we really don't feel up to it, yet we shake it out, like we're prepping for a role, and give it our best grammy-winning performance?

I started thinking about my own performances-like when I had a large snake dropped in my lap by my niece and nephews as the kids looked on, and I grinned and pretended that the slithering creature didn't scare me just a little bit. Or all the times that I pretend that my little scribblers are the next Rembrandts. I mean, that is an act, right?

Again, I love my kids to death, but there are those moments when I'm just not feeling the moment, but I ACT like I do.

Just some random thoughts on a Wednesday...

Peace Out,
Mom

1. Stop trying so hard to do everything

2. Find focus...I really do think that there are so many people and causes that need our help. I think that it's everyone's duty as a human on this earth to go out and lend a hand somewhere. I also think that it is something that you should feel passionately about. That being said, I hear so many voices and so many needs screaming out for help, and I am really having a hard time focusing in on a cause where I could really help. After hearing Ben Skinner talking about the slave trade, I was heartbroken and wanted to help. After reading about all of the people dying due to hunger and malnutrition, I wanted to help. I want to help kids who need a home or someone to talk to...like I said, I need to find focus.

3. Get more organized. My older boys need some help with school, and the only way that I can do that is to get organized and put us all on a schedule that we can follow.

4. Get healthy. I'm not going to drop the "I am going to lose weight" bomb, but, well, I'm not so young anymore and this body needs an overhaul...you know?? :-)

5. Have fun. This life is short. This year, in the past three months, my husband has lost an uncle(in Oct), and aunt(one week ago), and a cousin(today). His uncle left behind a very sad wife and kids. His aunt left behind a host of children and grandkids, and his cousin, after losing his mother the week before, decided that he didn't want to fight his illness anymore and stopped taking medication. (The aunt and uncle weren't married to each other-it was his mom's sis and another aunt's husband). You blink and another year passes. Since my FIL's passing and my mom's near miss, I've learned to thank God for every day that I have and not take advantage of that blessing. I also say yes a lot more than I used to. That really makes a big difference.

6. Value my job and my home. Times are TOUGH! So many people around us are losing their jobs. I am not going to complain about mine. ;-)

7. Hug. I am going to just hug everyone more. That sounds like fun, doesn't it??? ;-)

That's all for now. Happy New Year!!!! Have a great 2009!!!!

Peace Out,
Mom