Things That Make You Go Hmmmmm...
1/11/2009 10:35:00 AM 3 Comments »
My husband and his cousins had a falling out. I don't really know what happened, but I think it had something to do with us buying our house. Let me esplain...
My hubby and his cousins were very close. They moved out here to SD together in the 80's. They lived together, helped each other out, and eventually, they watched each other get married and start families. I was in one of the cousin's weddings, and he was in ours. They were close.
Well, a few years before we were ready to buy a place, one of the cousins studied to become a real estate agent. It was a great time to get in, as the market was shooting through the roof. He did it for a few years, and then moved on to his next business venture. He does this often. He's now a truck driver, and in the past, he operated two car garages. Anyway, it is about that time that we were ready to look for a place. Cousin was very involved in the new business, although he was still licensed to act as our real estate agent. However, my son's teacher was a real estate agent and she was VERY helpful. She hooked us up with some funding, and she drove us around on the weekends to all the places in our price range.
Now, cousin knew that we were looking at places, but he just didn't have the time to help us look. So his solution was this: He wanted us to find the place with our friend, and then when we decided on a place, let him make the offer so that he would get the commission on the place, this leaving my friend high and dry. Wait...What???
Yeah, he wanted her to do all of the work and he wanted to get paid for it. My answer: Hell to the No! That would be taking credit for all of someone else's hard work. This deal would make the real estate agent at least 5 percent. We bought our house for about 400k. Do the math-that's a freakin' lot of money!!!
So, after that, we lost touch. We would call, they wouldn't answer. They stopped calling us and we didn't see them for quite some time. Then, my hubby's dad died and we saw them at the funeral. It was bittersweet. I was so happy to see them, especially their girls, but I was a little annoyed that all of that time had passed without getting all of those hard feelings out. I thought the death would bring them close again. It didn't.
Then two weeks ago, the cousins' mom died. My hubby went back for the funeral and they talked again.
Now, I am getting ready to go over to see them all for the Chargers game today. They have never discussed why they don't talk. They are trying to move on by pretending that it didn't happen. I think that's bullshit. I'm a firm believer in talking it all out and fixing it-not covering over it and pretending its not a mess.
So I get to try to make nice with the wives and commence the small talk, all while wondering whether I'm going to say something that might trigger the fight again...I just don't know what that might be.
Peace Out,
Mom
My hubby and his cousins were very close. They moved out here to SD together in the 80's. They lived together, helped each other out, and eventually, they watched each other get married and start families. I was in one of the cousin's weddings, and he was in ours. They were close.
Well, a few years before we were ready to buy a place, one of the cousins studied to become a real estate agent. It was a great time to get in, as the market was shooting through the roof. He did it for a few years, and then moved on to his next business venture. He does this often. He's now a truck driver, and in the past, he operated two car garages. Anyway, it is about that time that we were ready to look for a place. Cousin was very involved in the new business, although he was still licensed to act as our real estate agent. However, my son's teacher was a real estate agent and she was VERY helpful. She hooked us up with some funding, and she drove us around on the weekends to all the places in our price range.
Now, cousin knew that we were looking at places, but he just didn't have the time to help us look. So his solution was this: He wanted us to find the place with our friend, and then when we decided on a place, let him make the offer so that he would get the commission on the place, this leaving my friend high and dry. Wait...What???
Yeah, he wanted her to do all of the work and he wanted to get paid for it. My answer: Hell to the No! That would be taking credit for all of someone else's hard work. This deal would make the real estate agent at least 5 percent. We bought our house for about 400k. Do the math-that's a freakin' lot of money!!!
So, after that, we lost touch. We would call, they wouldn't answer. They stopped calling us and we didn't see them for quite some time. Then, my hubby's dad died and we saw them at the funeral. It was bittersweet. I was so happy to see them, especially their girls, but I was a little annoyed that all of that time had passed without getting all of those hard feelings out. I thought the death would bring them close again. It didn't.
Then two weeks ago, the cousins' mom died. My hubby went back for the funeral and they talked again.
Now, I am getting ready to go over to see them all for the Chargers game today. They have never discussed why they don't talk. They are trying to move on by pretending that it didn't happen. I think that's bullshit. I'm a firm believer in talking it all out and fixing it-not covering over it and pretending its not a mess.
So I get to try to make nice with the wives and commence the small talk, all while wondering whether I'm going to say something that might trigger the fight again...I just don't know what that might be.
Peace Out,
Mom
3 comment/s:
Sometimes things are better left undiscussed, especially if they've seen how they were wrong.
How did it go on Sunday?
It was okay. The wives weren't there, so that was a little weird. But it was really great to see the girls. I really missed them!
And I thought the whole let's-not-talk-about-it-and-smooth-things-over was a white middle class thing. There goes (one shard of) my inferiority complex! :-)
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